Good morning, all! I hope that your Monday was good. Sometimes Mondays are good despite their reputation of being quite the opposite. Mondays are not known for the goodness and loveliness. I wouldn’t want to be a Monday. For me, any day can feel like a Monday if you let it. Any day without coffee would feel like a Monday to me…a week of Mondays – maybe even a month – all rolled into one actually. Don’t stand between me and my coffee. You could get hurt. Consider yourself warned. 🙂
Just a side note: If we continue to get rain like we’ve had for the last couple of weeks, next week’s posts might be sent from a boat. Just saying. Maybe not an ark, but a boat nonetheless. Geez.
So I pondered and pondered about what today’s tips should be about. I decided on tips to a happy hubby (or wife as we do have a few male readers) because it’s pretty important that your spouse be happy. Now, we can’t MAKE anyone happy, but we can do our part to create a joyful environment that promotes happiness. (That sounds like psychologist-speak, doesn’t it?) So here are our tips to a happy hubby.
1. Make your house one that he wants to come home to.
Before my hubby comes home, I try to have the downstairs nice and tidy. His spot on the couch is free. The big TV is his for the watching. “A man’s home is his castle.” That’s an old saying. It’s a true saying. Make him feel like the king for a while. (This does not mean you bow down to serve him dinner.) But make your home a welcoming place for him. He’ll appreciate it. He might not say it, but he will. I also try to be looking pretty decent when he gets home. I’m sure he doesn’t want to come home every day to me in shabby sweats and looking all kinds of rough. So I try to get “cleaned up” before he gets home. 🙂
2. Cook dinner.
A hungry man is never a happy man. (You can quote me on that.) Walking into the house with the smell of something yummy simmering on the stove or in the crock pot – divine! I don’t know about you, but my husband will call from work just to see what’s for dinner. No, he can not ever remember what’s on the menu plan. Sigh. If you are one of those people whose husband does the cooking most of the time, just surprise him occasionally by doing it yourself.
3. When he comes home, put aside the things that distract you.
My husband comes in from work, takes a shower, and then wants to watch “Seinfeld.” (When he’s on night shift, #2 does not apply. He doesn’t do big breakfast.) I am working hard to be done with my computer work by the time he gets home. I am trying to be better about setting my phone aside as well. So I play my games and check Facebook and all that before he gets home. This is a tough one for me. I didn’t realize how much I was attached to my phone until I tried to un-attach myself. I’m a work in progress here.
4. Compliment him.
Men need to feel appreciated. Thank him for working hard. Compliment his amazing lawn mowing skills. Tell him he smells good. (This will probably not apply immediately after his demonstration of his lawn mowing skills.) Thank him when he takes his day off to build your raised garden beds. Make him feel special and important. I try to remember to say pretty often, “I appreciate that you work so that I don’t have to.”
5. Spend time alone with him without distractions.
Take a walk. Sit outside and enjoy nature. Take a ride on a pretty day. Have a picnic. Any of these things can be done without leaving your neighborhood. Other than the walk, they can be done without leaving home. My husband and I frequently sit outside and just laugh at the antics of the birds and squirrels. And of our cats who are fascinated by the birds and squirrels. Our kids think this is lame, so they don’t bother us. Works well. 🙂
6. Date your spouse.
Dating does not and should not end with a marriage certificate. It does not and should not end when you have kids. If you have small kids, you probably have friends who also have small kids. Work out a babysitting swap. You watch their kids while they go out on a date; they watch yours while you go out on a date. If the kids go to their house, you can have a date right at home. Dinner and a movie for cheap. You can actually light those candles that sit on the dining room table. Make your favorite meal. Cook it together. Just a few hours every month will do. If you can manage it every week, then by all means, go for it! Remember that your spouse comes before the kids. It’s especially hard when the kids are little. And when they are teenagers. Well, it’s just hard. But remember it.
7. Do things that he likes to do.
Watch football. Watch action movies. Watch wrestling. (My husband likes wrestling. I once went to a wrestling event with him and his friends. I wore the “championship belt” they bought. I cheered. It was a good thing.) If your husband watches a lot of sports and that doesn’t interest you, just sit in the room with him. Snuggle on the couch beside him and read. Note: This does not work during football season when yelling and jumping around are frequent occurrences. You could get thrown from the couch. It’s safer to sit in a chair nearby. Go fishing. Go hunting. And if he loves fishing or hunting and you don’t want to go (I wouldn’t if my husband did those things), encourage him to do what he loves and send him off into nature without making him feel guilty for not being home with you.
8. Spend time with his family and friends.
Unless there is some serious dysfunction or animosity going on, spend time with his family. When you marry the man, you marry the whole family. Encourage him to spend time with his parents, siblings, etc. Do your best to spend time with his family as you do with your family. If it’s not possible due to distance, do the best you can to keep them in contact. If you have a man like mine, talking on the phone isn’t his thing. Encourage him to pick up the phone and call his parents, his sister or brother, whoever. Encourage him to spend time with his friends. Unless they are bad influences. Then encourage him to find new ones.) Have the guys over to watch football. Make friends with his friends and their wives. Take the time to get together with them. Have one or two couples that are fun to be around and who model a good marriage. Spend time with them. It’s good for everyone.
9. Get away.
Like away away. Overnight. Once or twice a year, take a little trip. Just the two of you. Farm out the kiddos and hit the road. When your kids get old enough and reliable enough to stay home alone, oh what a happy day! And don’t let anyone make you feel guilty about going away. Take a honeymoon every year. If finances are tight, have the kids sleep over at grandma’s or a trustworthy friend’s house, and stay home. Have a “staycation” as they are called these days. Focus on one another. Try to resist the urge to check on the kids 1,208 times a day. Keep your cell phone on you (charged, of course) and have grandma call only if it’s really important. Check in on the kids a couple of times a day. But just enjoy being alone with your spouse.
Have sex with your husband. Frequently. No further explanation required.
Have a great Tuesday!